Celebrity fan of the month

Gavin and Stacey is back on the BBC. And we all know that means. Gavin's (actor Mathew Horne) 125 Year Anniversary Tottenham shirt, an integral part of the shows narrative (kind of). Remember the 125 shirt? That half blue, half white concoction that was insanely expensive to buy and inspired us to a 4-4 draw with Aston Villa? Some people loathe the thing; I rather like it.

Horne, a staunch Spurs fan, had it written into the show that his Gavin character was also a big Tottenham boy. It makes geographical sense seeing as, in the show, Gavin is based in Essex and Horne has played up the opportunity to display his and his character's allegiance to the cause.

The kit theme is one of the main reasons Horne became a Spurs fan in the first place. He was originally from Nottingham but revealed his conversion to Spurs in an interview with The Guardian in March 2009.

I'm a Tottenham fan because of a 1986 Panini sticker album. I was
one of those kids who had a brick of stickers in the playground - got, got,
need, need badly - and I think I'd pretty much completed the album when my Dad
suggested I get a football kit for Christmas. I chose the kit I liked most.
Which is probably the stupidest reason to support a football club.

Not stupid, Mathew. Classic. He's my first and, probably last, celebrity Spurs fan of the month, ladies and gentlemen. Grand applause.

Red letter day for stand-in skipper

A hard fought 1-1 draw it was at the Villa and I only went and called it, didn't I? I didn't envisage Michael Dawson, stand-in-skipper, grabbing a fine equaliser but my predicting skills are getting better and better - this coming from the man who thought Spurs would only get a nervy win over Wigan.

In the battle to see who was better equipped to have a crack at the top four or, more realistically, just to see who's likely to come fifth, Spurs and Villa cancelled each other out in an absorbing but never really exciting game at Villa Park. The home side's early goal, courtesy of a bundled finish from Gabriel Agbonlahor and some hapless Spurs defending, ensured that Tottenham would be chasing the game and they responded brilliantly by launching a well planned and steady assault on the Villa goal. Jermain Defoe was a live wire, clearly buzzing on the confidence of his five goal haul last week. The only thing he couldn't do was score; he even had one chalked off for using his hand, the cheeky bugger. Looks like only Thierry Henry and Paul Scharner are allowed to do that.

Niko Kranjcar was again superb, drifting infield from his customary left wing berth and threatening with his every touch of the ball. He managed some testing efforts on goal, too - the one touch move that resulted in him half-volleying Peter Crouch's knockdown towards the net would have been one of the finest goals ever seen were it not for the outstretched hand of Brad Friedel. Crouch was his usual ever present self, providing the aerial dominance and neat flicks that help his team-mates so much. He didn't go too close to scoring but his unselfish game is becoming more and more useful to the fighting cause as the weeks go by.

Aaron Lennon wasn't at his supreme, Wigan-like best but was still very much a handful. He often found himself in space on the right and produced some wonderful moments of skill and trickery. His final ball wasn't that pretty at times but that'll get better with time (hopefully). Tom Huddlestone was also a player who caught the eye. An ever-present for Tottenham this season in the Premier League, his crisp passing and midfield positioning was on display from all to see, including Franco Baldini, Fabio Capello's assistant, in the stands. And all this from a player we were previously lamenting for having anonymous away games. He's a man on the up, for sure; a result, surely, of Harry Redknapp's influence as coach.

Tottenham pressed hard for almost the entire game and just as it looked as though we wouldn't be rewarded for our fine endeavours, a high ball was knocked into the path of the marauding Dawson. The defender controlled the ball using his upper arm chest and lashed a splendid shot high into the net for a more than deserved leveller. Relief was paramount - Seb Bassong looked as if he was going to cry, he was so elated. Spurs pressed on and could have stolen the win when Lennon's whipped cross flashed across the face of goal but Defoe was unable to make contact and Redknapp's men had to make do with a point.

Although the result moves Spurs temporarily up to third place, the game was surely a contest to determine (for now at least) who is on top of the pile behind the top four. And despite the neutral result, you have to sense that Tottenham have the better quality. The attacking forces of Defoe, Robbie Keane, Crouch, Lennon, Kranjcar and the returning Luka Modric look more likely to provide a goal than Villa's front men and there's an all round confidence about Spurs that is providing some irresistible football at present.

Tough tests are still to come, however, and as with the Wigan result, Redknapp will be well advised to urge his players to immediately move on to the next game and past the hang ups of this one. The matches with the likes of Villa, Man City and other fifth place contenders are surely going to be crucial in determining Tottenham's final position this season and whilst a point away at Villa is nothing to frown at, there will come a time in the future when three points are vitally necessary and Spurs will need to be at their premium to ensure they don't slip away in those types of games.

But, for now, all credit to them. Tottenham are synonymous with dropping heads and flailing confidence and to come back from going down to such a weak early goal speaks volumes about their new-found belief. There's an ability there, that's for sure, and Redknapp is currently and quietly harnessing as much of it as he can. Their collective response to going a goal down was perfect today and, for the supposed away team, they dominated the rest of the game.

Finally, massive happiness and relief to Dawson. His perfect day as captain was almost reduced to nothingness when his first half goal-bound effort was heroically blocked off the line by Carlos Cuellar. So it was particularly heart warming for him to lash in the equaliser late in the game. A fitting end to an excellent display from the loyal centre back. Good on you, Daws.

Get your record player out

In an admittedly short lifetime of supporting Tottenham Hotspur, Sunday will be a day I remember for a long, long time. A record score, a record number of goals, a record individual performance, a record number of wound-up Arsenal friends... it seems good things do actually happen to those who wait.

The Jermain Defoe inspired 9-1 win over Wigan was a simple fusion of ridiculous attacking confidence and woeful away defending. When Titus Bramble has a bad game, he has a catastrophically bad game and the combined attacking forces of Aaron Lennon, Niko Kranjcar, Peter Crouch and Defoe were far, far too much for the hapless Wigan defence. That keeper Chris Kirkland had a good game and still managed to concede nine goals is a testament to the freak nature of the result. But do we care? You can bet your life we don't.

Defoe? Words, for the first time, threaten to fail me. He was simply world class; weaving in and out of space, arrowing the ball into the far corners of the net with hardly any effort, tormenting the away side with his constant running and movement. Five goals and he should have had more. But to ask such things of him surely smacks of greediness. He was supported superbly by the omnipresent Crouch, who utilised his height and strength to amazing effect. He was involved in many of the goals and his all round game was the perfect foil for the goal hungry Defoe. Crouch may have played second fiddle in this instance but his contribution shouldn't be underestimated.

On the wing, Lennon gave ex-Spur Erik Edman a torrid time. Jinking left and right, moving the ball at lightning pace, whipping dangerous balls into the box, Lennon would have been a match for any Premier League left back. Edman, someone who I always rated when he was at Spurs, had absolutely no answer and after his 107th mauling at the hands of our diminutive right winger, one had to feel sorry for him. If Lennon maintains a level of performance similiar to this one, then he should be England's right winger at the World Cup. No issue. Theo Walcott might be good but when was the last time he completely devastated another team in the manner of Lennon on Sunday?

Kranjcar was no less brilliant on the other flank, his skill on the ball evident to all in attendance. His passing was top notch and he managed to see runs and spaces that others on the pitch would have been blind to. He's proved to be a fantastic purchase and a fantastic alternative to Luka Modric on the left. Indeed, as our record-buy Croatian gets nearer to a return to the team, our midfield options appear to be on the up. Kranjcar is exactly the kind of squad player we need to be where we want to be.

It's hard to fault the team at all in a performance like that. The Wigan goal, even though it was a blatant handball, was still notable for the space afforded to Paul Scharner in our box. But to poke holes at the defence in a performance like that is pointless. They did good. End of story. And if Jonathan Woodgate has this effect when captaining the team, he can gladly do it again.

Where does this result leave us then, in the grand scheme of things? A return to the top four was extremely welcome though a greater indication of our strength will be displayed by our performance/result when we head to Villa Park on Saturday evening. Traditionally a tough place to visit, a win there would go absolutely miles to confirming our status as the leaders of the top four chasing pack. Still, a point wouldn't be completely out of the question and Harry Redknapp will doubtless be quick to urge his players to put the Wigan result behind them and move on.

Still, Defoe's confidence must be on an absolute sky high right now. Only the third player to score five goals in a Premier League game, he's up there with the best at present and must keep performing to the heights that we all know he can reach. Then, and only then, can he be assured of his World Cup place that he so covets. Lord knows, the man deserves it.

Tougher challenges than Wigan will come but why worry about that. We mauled 'em. And it's a performance and a result that deserves all the accolade and attention it will get in years to come. A famous day and hopefully the foundation to further success.

And, yes, I'm giving the 8th goal to David Bentley and not as a Kirkland own goal. The quality of the shot and the quality of the keeper's performance mean that Bentley deserves a goal and Kirkland doesn't deserve an own goal against his name. Make of that what you will.

9-1

9-1.

9 f*cking 1.

We actually went and spanked Wigan by nine chuffing goals to one.

And all that after I foretold a nervy 2-1 win? This result could put me out of business (if I actually made any money from this site).

I'm too delirious to post anything of real value right now so expect more either later on in the evening or tomorrow, when I'll have hopefully recovered to a suitable state. Until then, just bask in the glory of it all and laugh at anyone who tries to belittle the result. They're just jealous, trust me.

I'm off to paint 9-1 all over my neighbours front door. I've gone that crazy.

Winning breeds confidence?

With the international breaks at an end for a fair few months now, Tottenham have an opportunity to lock their collective mind on continuing their impressive progress in the Premier League. Wigan visit the Lane tomorrow afternoon and as enigmatic as the visitors appear to be at times, Spurs' slick passing should be more than a match for them and provided the strikers can locate their specially made shooting boots, there could be goals in the offing.

While it's all well and good picking up points when playing badly as we did against Sunderland, one suspects many a Spurs fan would feel all the better for a solid, deserving performance. Looking back critically at the results of the last few months and you could realistically say that the last time Tottenham battered an opposition and picked up the requisite three points was the 5-0 Robbie Keane-inspired demolition of Burnley. The Pompey win was not without it's second half jitters (although we did dominate the first 45 minutes), the Sunderland win was well documented in the anti-Tottenham press as one we did not deserve and the win over Everton in the Carling Cup doesn't really count because, well, y'know, it's a Mickey Mouse tournament, innit? Whatever you say, Arsenal fans.

Wigan represents the perfect opportunity to right a few wrongs and finally put to bed that calamitous North London Derby performance of last month - a game that a few fans may still be having a hard time getting over. Aaron Lennon is said to be returning from injury which can only be a good thing. His pace and all round trickery has been much missed on the right hand side. Sorry Bentley but you just don't cut the mustard, my son. Jermain Defoe should play - which doesn't sound very surprising or newsworthy at all. But given that he's only played the Sunderland game since his suspension, we should all be thankful for his return. It's not too long ago we were branding him the best goal-scoring finisher in the Premier League.

Ledley King and Jonathan Woodgate have the opportunity to pair up at centre back again - a defensive combination that leaves Tottenham fans happy and opposition strikers nervous. King's brute force is the perfect foil for Woodgate's positioning and guile and the two of them, if extremely fallible injury-wise, make one of the best defensive partnerships in the land. And should Hugo Rolladega and co. find himself in behind the two of them, he'll have the imposing figure of the cat-like Heurelho Gomes to overcome. Gomes was outrageously good in the fortuitous win over Sunderland and the more games he has like that, the more he endears himself to the home fans and to the critics.

Spurs need 90 minutes of relaxed and confident football, if anything, to ease any doubts they may have themselves over the way they've been playing lately. A home game against modest opposition is the optimum chance to reclaim a bit of pride and self respect. And the potential three points would also come in handy for keeping us nicely nestled inside the top four, ahead of the chasing pack (Man City, Liverpool, Villa, etc).

But, for all the talk of the need for a good performance, I suspect that the win would be welcome no matter the manner of how it is achieved. My modest prediction? A deserved, if slightly nervy, 2-1 Tottenham win. COYS.

The bloody French

Thierry Henry. A contentious and topical subject if ever there was one.

Whilst the footballing world today recoils in disgust at the actions of the France captain, there are plenty of misguided Arsenal fans who will be lightning quick to shout you down if you dare as to utter a derogatory comment. He is, in their eyes, still a hero and a saviour. But such luminary titles shouldn't just be decided by footballing talent, of which Henry has plenty. The mark of a sporting hero or a 'legend' is their all round approach and attitude to the game and what they've done to promote the sport in the best light to others. Danny Blanchflower was a hero. Bobby Robson was a hero. What Henry did last night was a despicable act, cheating a hard working nation out of worldwide recognition and using foul tactics to ensure that his side would prosper.

Before I begin on a dissertation length rant about the virtues of fair play and sportsmanship, I'll leave you with this article by Richard Williams in The Guardian. For all the cries of foul play, a simple fact has been missed and one that Henry may end up regretting for a long while.

Suffice to say, he'll not come out of this farce with a protected reputation. And the suspicious eyes of the world will be on the French team for many a reason come next summer.

England's Tom Huddlestone

Apologies about the lack of posting recently. I've slipped into a euphoria-induced coma at the sight of Tom Huddlestone and Peter Crouch both coming on for England in Doha on Saturday. The prognosis? I'll be okay in the long run but Jermaine Jenas definitely won't go to the World Cup.

I promise normal service will be resumed shortly, once the deluge of Uni work is eased a little bit. Until then, you'll have to make do with a few briefs.

Danny Rose scored England's winner at Wembley. Okay, it was the Under 21's but it's the thought that counts. Rose blossomed on the left wing and nailed the solitary strike in a crucial 1-0 win. Also, John Bostock has joined Brentford on a short term loan deal. And has he joined them. He cracked a superb two goals in his first game against Millwall and delivered an all round promising display that suggests that the early hype surrounding him was not unfounded. I've been silently hoping he gets some loan action for a while now and this can only bode well.

Back to the international front and Benoit Assou Ekotto and Sebastien Bassong joined the growing list of Spurs players who will be playing at next summer's World Cup as Cameroon qualified with a 2-0 win on Adel Taarabt's Morocco. Roman Pavlyuchenko's Russia have one nervous foot in the finals after going 2-1 up in their play-off with Slovenia. Although let's be honest, he's unlikely to still be a Tottenham player come next year.

For Robbie Keane's Ireland, it's an uphill struggle in the extreme. A 1-0 defeat in Dublin to the formidable French leaves them needing to go to Paris and, first, get a goal and, second, actually win the tie. It's a tall order but don't count them out too early. In Cardiff, Gareth Bale's Wales saw off Alan Hutton's Scotland comfortably and Niko Kranjcar got some playing time as Croatia thrashed Liechtenstein 5-0. All in all a fairly solid weekend for Tottenham players here, there and everywhere.

But my moment of the weekend is surely Tom Huddlestone's England debut. A fine passer of the ball he always was, he is now an England player, however transient his appearances may prove to be. Here's hoping he uses his debut as a platform to greater things.

The inner workings of the British media

Before the Arsenal-Tottenham game:

Tabloid hack 1: Oi... you heard about this?
Tabloid hack 2: What's that?
1: Robbie Keane. The fool. He's only gone and said that Spurs are better than Arsenal and will definitely take their top four spot this season, hasn't he?
2: He hasn't? Word for word?
1: Well... he said something about the Tottenham bench being better than Arsenal's but he's blatantly thinking that just because they're not doing terribly this year they're gonna to win the bleedin' league. It's obvious.
2: Massively obvious. You should print it.
1: I'm gonna. Gonna make him sound like a right mug, too. Who does he think he is anyway?
2: I know. Bloody Tottenham. Thinking that they have a right to win a few games and be a good football team. How dare they have ambition? It's laughable.
1: They should realise that the top four is an elite club and not for the likes of him and Spurs. It's not like they've got loads of money like that Man City lot or loads of promising, love-able, young English players like Villa or Everton.
2: Too right. At least they've earned the right to be slightly close to the top four - what have Tottenham done that makes them a reasonably big team?
1: Well... they've got a little bit of history, haven't they? First British team to win a European competition? First English side to do the double? Something like that?
2: Yeah but that doesn't matter. Everyone knows that to be a big team you need to have had a successful last five or ten years. Everything prior to that might as well have not happened.
1: Of course, you're right. Haven't they been slightly hovering around the top seven for the last four or so years though?
2: Yeah... but... they're just shit, innit. And they came 11th a few years back, which shows them for what they are. A nothing team.
1: You're right. I'm so glad I support the team I do. We always get nice things said about us in the papers and by that Andy Gray bloke on Sky.
2: Fancy a pint?
1: Yeah. We'll go to the Emirates. I've got my cheque book on me.
2: Cool I'll bring my book. Could do with a bit of peace and quiet.
1: Isn't there a game on, though?
2: Yeah. And?

After the Arsenal-Tottenham game:

1: Haha! I knew that would happen!
2: I knew it too. God bless the Arsenal.
1: And God bless the top four!
2: Indeed.
1: How funny that they were convinced they were gonna beat them then they got completely mugged!
2: To be fair, they were absolutely convinced that they would win. The smug fools.
1: That Robbie Keane certainly got his comeuppance didn't he? Made to look a twat by the intellectual taunts of the Gooner fans. God they were good.
2: Keane's rubbish. And a bad person, too. It's not like he's got a pretty good scoring record for Tottenham in the Premier League or anything like that.
1: Did you see how pathetically their defence crumbled?
2: I laughed my head off. They always harp on about how good Ledley King is but he was completely awful in that game and, to be honest, every game I've ever seen him in.
1: Really? He's not that bad is he? I mean, don't get me wrong, I hate him and everything he represents. But when he was fit he used to be a pretty decent centre back. He even did pretty well up until the Arse started scoring for fun on Saturday.
2: Well, that's where you're wrong. He was never any good and was always lucky. Strikers made him look good. He's nowhere near as good as Matthew Upson or Joleon Lescott.
1: Erm... right yeah.
2: So much for all that talk about them having a stronger squad then as well!
1: Yep, they've been proved wrong in every aspect. Weren't they missing some pretty decent players though? Defoe, Lennon, Modric?
2: Yeah but they're shit anyway. Everyone knows that. And, besides, Arsenal were missing Theo Walcott and Samir Nasri - two players who would have, undoubtedly, ripped Spurs to pieces. That's a fact.
1: They would have, as well. And Bentner had to come off injured as well. And we all know what that Danish magician is capable of!
2: Spurs are lucky. They should have been beaten 10-0.
1: (awkward pause) 10-0? Isn't that a bit unrealistic?

(Hack 2 stares intently at Hack 1, with a persuasive malice in his eyes)

1: Yeah, 10-0. Definitely. How you gonna shape your report?
2: I'm gonna go with something really quite harsh and demeaning. As long as I make Spurs and their fans out o be the bad people that they are.
1: Too right. They all think they're going to get into the top four this season. The players, the fans, the coaches, everyone.
2: Ever heard any of them say that they definitely will?
1: Erm...

After the Tottenham-Sunderland game:

1: Damn. I was hoping for something else to rub in their faces.
2: I know. What a piss take. How a team can be so outplayed and deserving of defeat is beyond me. And then they had the cheek to go and win! Cheats.
1: I'm furious. And it's not like they themselves completely battered Stoke at their ground the other week and lost so justice has been done or anything like that. It's just an outrage.
2: They're doing themselves no favours. They should just accept that everyone hates them and start losing so we can all make fun at their expense. Maybe the Guardian could publish another full page spread of Tottenham jokes, making fun at their bad start to the season as if they're the only team to ever have a bad start to a season.
1: That's the hope, mate.
2: I massively wanted them to lose for Darren Bent's sake. They treated him so badly when he was there and he deserved to score and win so he could gloat in front them and we could all laugh arrogantly.
1: They never gave him an opportunity to flourish did they? Or did they? I do seem to remember he had more than a season and a half to prove he was good enough and never really cut it? He had that shocker against Pompey... maybe he just wasn't good enough for them?
2: Totally wrong. He's banging in the goals now at Sunderland, (under his breath) admittedly a more suitable level for him.
1: Of course he is. Did you see Gomes completely clean him out for the penalty?
2: I did, mate. Never had eyes for the ball, only for the man. And then they tried to complain about it, didn't they?
1: Yep. My man Benty was so unlucky that his brilliantly struck penalty was saved by that cheat Gomes, who should have been red carded and deported for the X-rated challenge.
2: It's just not fair. Unfortunately Spurs will keep on cheating until they're found out. You know, picking up wins, scoring goals, playing nice football. All these things that we know they're not capable of but they keep fooling everyone into believing they can.
1: Why do we hate Spurs so much?
2: Hard to pinpoint, to be frank with you. I think it's just because they have all these plans and ambitions to become something like the club they once were and it unsettles us. Because they've got goals that they want to achieve and they keep making a mess of getting there. Because they're a reasonably good side and are threatening the dominance of the top four. God I love the top four.
1: I agree. How dare they try and become a successful club again? Do they not know that the established order is there for a reason?
2: Obviously not. And they get all these actually quite good players like Carrick, Berbatov, now Modric and think that they're brilliant. Then when they actually turn out to be brilliant, they moan when bigger teams take them off 'em. It's laughable.
1: Oh well, hopefully they'll crash and burn soon and we can all go back to resting on our piles of cash without losing sleep, eh?
2: Fingers crossed. You going to the United game next week?
1: No mate. Bit of a long drive up from Sussex, so probably won't bother. Why go when you can watch it on Sky and hear Richard Keys wax lyrical about how good we are?
2: Too right. I'm off to write up my Spurs match report. I've got to try and fit in the words 'lucky', 'cheating', 'snatch' and 'steal' somehow.
1: Just slag them off, mate.
2: Already on it. That's why I do what I do.